Average Extra of: MATCHBOX: THE MOVIE Official Trailer (2026) John Cena: My Reaction by AverageMansReviews
Warning: there is flashing effects/colourful
effects/shooting/drugs. Yes there will be some censored adult language
references in this content.
My reaction: I have watched the 180 seconds trailer; Okay who's
bright idea was this?... Because yes I know it is never nice for someone to
lose their job, but with that being said someone's head needs to roll for this
one... I mean what the fudgin' were you thinking... Seriously!
The
storyline/script is basically this; the Matchbox Gang are childhood friends
that used to play with Matchbox, fast-forward may be 20 years; they all meet up
again and thanks to Sean Walker [John Cena:] he is a spy may or may not have
done something wrong, but he has now gotten his gang childhood friends involved
in his life and travels [I should point out; I believe I am in the right
ballpark, but some of these elements could be wrong.]
Basically
what we have here is a 126 minutes version of the Fast & Furious franchise;
but built for family viewing of predominantly all age ranges and man does it
follow that outlay, I mean basically what this gang used to do as children with
their Matchbox toys they now get to do as fully grown adults in real vehicles
and time, I mean that is the only connection between this film and Matchbox
which I have to say is incredibly tenuous to begin with, so no one had the idea
to slightly go with the concept of Honey, I Shrunk the Kids 1989; where this mad
scientist after waiting for Walker to pay off his accrued debt of $20 million;
he decides to shrink him and his friends down; that they can complete this
robbery; they each have one shot of normal size juice which lasts 30 minutes to
complete the heavy lifting, but other than that; you have 72 hours in your
small bodies to complete this mission and get back to me or you will remain the
size of just about the fingernail for the rest of her days.
I
mean okay; my storyline plot is cheesy and something of a similar model, but
and this is where mine is supremely better; it buys into Matchbox more fluently
as in; it puts Matchbox front and centre; they could be given a selection of fuelled
up vehicles to achieve this mission; they just have to get it out of the very
tiny [compared to them add a pinch of growth serum to the Matchbox and start
the engine.]
My prediction for this film is: 3/10, something poor; I like to give myself a little
bit of wiggle room; this movie just looks and feels insufferably generic on
every stage throughout this trailer quite frankly; it does look and feel like a
hot steaming pile of manure; it gets released on Apple TV on 09/10/2026.