Average Extra Special of: The Men's England 2026 World Cup Squad is a Joke by AverageMansReviews

Average Extra Special of: The Men's England 2026 World Cup Squad is a Joke by AverageMansReviews

Warning: there is going to be some censored adult language and references

Goalkeepers: Dean Henderson - Crystal Palace, Jordan Pickford - Everton, James Trafford - Manchester City.

For me In: Nick Pope - Newcastle United Out: James Trafford: he doesn't have enough for Manchester City week in and week out, so what the fudge is he doing here?

Defenders: Dan Burn - Newcastle United,  Marc Guéhi - Manchester City, Reece James - Chelsea [if you break down or get injured, we are going to be in deep manure,] Ezri Konsa - Aston Villa, Tino Livramento - Newcastle, Nico O'Reilly - Manchester City, Jarell Quansah - Bayer Leverkusen, Djed Spence - Tottenham Hotspur, John Stones - Manchester City.

For me In: Trent Alexander-Arnold - Real Madrid; I hasten to add he is listed as absent/other for his club at the moment, so I don't know what is happening there before the tournament begins; he has too many utility positions to play; in the back line and a holding midfielder if needs be; set-piece and long ball and crosses specialist and Harry Maguire - Manchester United; because he got here on merit throughout the previous season under Michael Carrick. Out: if everybody is fit Djed Spence, nothing personal just preference Alexander-Arnold, but Spence is a back-up if Alexander-Arnold is not cleared and there is absolutely no justification for Stones to be here other than he qualifies to represent England and the statistics do not lie he has only played 8 times in the Premiership this season and 17 times in total, this is horse manure of the highest order, when Maguire absolutely trounces Stones with a respectable 23 times in the league and 25 in total.

Midfielders: Elliot Anderson - Nottingham Forest: Jude Bellingham - Real Madrid [he can be a world beater or a liability with his mood swings, so I would regard him as a potential problem,]  Eberechi Eze - Arsenal, Jordan Henderson - Brentford, Kobbie Mainoo - Manchester United, Declan Rice - Arsenal, Morgan Rogers - Aston Villa.

For me In: Morgan Gibbs-White - Nottingham Forest Out: Jordan Henderson; quite frankly he needs to get off the fudgin' aeroplane, there is yet again absolutely no justification for him to be here, I mean we already have two holding midfielders in Anderson, Rice and as a push Mainoo can do a job there and like a referenced earlier Alexander-Arnold could do a job there as well so at best you have 4 holding players how many did you want? Henderson based on stats has yes play 32 times, scoring 1 goal and assisting 3, whilst Gibbs-White; 37 games; 15 goals, 4 assists and becoming a crossing specialist and set-piece option, I am absolutely fudge furious, by Henderson's selection, because it has been indicated that he has been chosen for his experience and team experienced; if that is what we are basing our selection on which is a hot steaming pile of manure, on that basis can we take Phil Foden - Manchester City? I mean granted I know he hasn't had a good season, but at least he might be able to unlock some defences, or Thomas Tuchel - England Manager was looking for someone to be in a leader off and potentially on the pitch, he should have selected Harry Maguire problem solved, no waste of a selection.

Forwards: Anthony Gordon - Newcastle United/Barcelona, Harry Kane - Bayern Munich, Noni Madueke - Arsenal, Marcus Rushford - Barcelona, on loan from Manchester United, Bukayo Saka - Arsenal, Ivan Toney - Al-Ahli, Ollie Watkins - Aston Villa.

I'm going to begin this section slightly differently by saying; the selection here is either justifiable or pig's manure; so For me In: Dominic Calvert-Lewin - Leeds United Out: Anthony Gordon; why is Gordon even here? He has been in big headed idiot towards Newcastle United; he hasn't really done anything outstanding; altogether 43 matches; 16 goals and just 3 assists this season, when Calvert-Lewin; 35 matches; 14 goals and 1 assist and he isn't afraid to be in the mix to get hurt if it leads to a goal. In: Jarrod Bowen Out: Noni Madueke for 95% there is no justification for him to be here; 38 matches, 6 goals, 1 assist, Bowen has 39 matches; 9 goals and 12 assists altogether and now let's talk about that 5% shall we? The only reason he is here is to cover Saka in any way shape or form either as substitute or injury like Arsenal do.

Don't get me wrong I would love to drop Rushford; but at Barcelona he has just done enough to get called up with 45 games; 13 goals and 10 assists this season, now let me clarify I don't think Rushford has ever really fulfilled his true potential and now it could be possibly getting worse because of Gordon joining Barcelona prominently and for Ivan Toney; I have great reservations, because he is now playing in the Saudi Arabia league for Al-Ahli; where his stats are as follows; 44 matches; 35 goals; 9 assists; but he is hardly up against World class players week in and week out, so that is why I have reservations about him and for Ollie Watkins; typical centre forward; 53 matches; 21 goals; 5 assists, and what I meant by a typical centre forward is; in one match he could look world-class and in the next for 89 minutes you get nothing from him, but he contributes one act leading to a goal, which justifies his selection and everything in the middle of his performances and I should just point out now that my statistics include international matches; European and domestic cup competitions yes.

My broad perspective for this World Cup team: well as you can probably tell I am really, really don't like the selection; Stones, Henderson and Gordon for sure should not be going; Maguire and Gibbs-White should absolutely be going without question a specially when you have Stones sitting right there which has done pretty much fudge all; all season. We have no grit which both Calvert-Lewin and Bowen would have given us and there are two massive question-marks over Bellingham; if he has his head screwed on properly? and Toney; if you can still compete at this top level even though I know he is just 30 years old at that point of this content being first created? In my final opinion for this content; we are just not strong enough or well equipped enough to go into this World Cup; it is that simple; because all our opponents have to do is stop England from feeding Kane, frustrate/wind-up Bellingham and have two players mark Saka; I know that sounds easier said than done... but this will be predominantly the game plan against us and everyone knows it; we won't have a Gibbs-White or a Foden or a Calvert-Lewin to offer something different or a spark from the bench, so I guarantee you it will be down to Watkins to find something or a Henderson or whatever purpose he is there for? Probably as the team’s water boy throughout these hydration breaks.