The Little Mermaid 2023 by AverageMansReviews

The Little Mermaid 2023 by AverageMansReviews

Review Time

Warning/Disclaimer: there is flashing effects/colourful effects/animal cruelty/transformation/racism/colonialism/drowning/environmental/disintegrating/impaling/regeneration. Disclaimer anything I say about this film is based on the fact that it is already in this film for me to interpret, so basically if it wasn't in this film I wouldn't be discussing it, so consequently I could not be held responsible for it to a certain extent, yes I can choose my words carefully but that is as far as it goes, once again if it wasn't in this film, I wouldn't be discussing it in the first place. I should give you the courtesy warning I am going to tear this reimagining a new blowhole, based on the parameters which Disney themselves headset [I will discuss this more later on, when it becomes appropriate to do so.]

When will Disney learn their golden age should stay in their history books: basically; Arial [Halle Bailey:] is a mermaid which is very curious about the humans on land, she is also the youngest daughter of King Triton [Javier Bardem:] the King of Atlantica, he tries to squash Aerial's thirst to know more about the humans, he is prejudiced against the humans. But there is one person that Arial could and does go to; to fulfil our wish and that is her auntie; Ursula [Melissa McCarthy/alter ego Human Vanessa:] a devious Sea Witch octopus tentacle, that offers her niece Arial this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity with a short window, with a small price of her siren singing powers/voice. But if she fails to win over Prince Eric [Jonah Hauer-King:] is a human which has been adopted into this royal family, which is in desperate search to find the person that saved his life. With a kiss within 72 hours Arial belongs to her auntie.

The framework and pacing of this 135 minutes film is; smooth and it just settles down to its task, I mean it smoothly rotates from the storyline to musical numbers and then back again without interrupting the flow, let's be honest here; this is not problematic in the slightest.

It's just everything else that is very much a mixed bag; art/action under water; this is where predominantly the strengths of this film lay, be it the colourful and/or the scenery including the musical numbers, even with Arial and Flounder [Jacob Tremblay:] a tropical fish which is Arial's best friend which has anxiety, but when the chips are down he will be there, let's just hope he isn't laying next to the chips; as they are being chased by this shark and yes they really went to town on bringing these musical numbers to life with good singing/alternative sing as well.

But now we talk about the ugly side of this film; the reimagining of Ursula just no, her make-up looks terrible, in the big action sequences towards the end of this film it just looks bad, what the hell were they thinking? It looks like something from the early 2000's as it relates to the computer animation, it looks clunky and sticky.

Flounder: just no thank you, likewise what the hell were they thinking? The same can be said for Sebastian: [voiced by Daveed Diggs:] the right-hander crab to the King, his most trusted adviser and he is tasked with watching over Arial and finally we have  King Triton; this is just a thumbs down for me; I mean this character from the animated version from Disney; in our years has I would say with an estimation of being in his 50's white hair be it on his head or facial still looking strong, you know wise but still able to put finn to posterior, but this live-action looks about well into his 60's and has more in common with a human from the same age bracket with their prejudice views then a ruler over his kingdom.

Now we come on to the massive, uncomfortable reality of this live-action film; now as we can see in this reimagining of this film title; we can clearly see that Arial is of different ethnic background okay is everyone with me so far? So here is the excellent question; when the Prince opens his eyes vaguely enough to see the outline of Arial and for those that haven't seen this film yet, yes they were stupid enough to put a camera shot of his vision of what he could see, so the viewers/the audience can clearly see what he sees and even without my glasses on I can see that she was not Caucasian, yes they have a small defence that Vanessa is using the siren powers so I'll give them a small defence but that is about it, but then again they even squash their own defence by Prince Eric making reference to Sir Grimsby [Art Malik:] the Prime Minister of of this Kingdom, where I am paraphrasing Prince Eric has not got a clue why he is doing this. Where the siren song should be still working in theory? Because if it doesn't it just makes Prince Eric sound and look stupid or I don't know maybe give your characters a three-dimensional outlook, you know some kind of inner conflict of this spell is working, but something in Eric is telling him this is the wrong person.

So let me get this right Disney decide to go with this reimagining of having someone of a different ethnic background to portray Arial, then for Arial's powers to be used by her auntie/a.k.a. Vanessa which is Caucasian, do we not see a problem here? This clearly has been be a case of colonialism here of a lighter skin individual taking something from someone that isn't or at the very least racism.

If Vanessa was of the same or similar ethnic background and Ursula is still Caucasian, this would still be a problem. It's almost like Disney have no idea what they are doing with basically modernising their classics with cleansing appropriation; you either don't do it or you do it completely where you basically cover your posterior so that someone like me doesn't pick up on the clear issues , I mean forgive me but I have brain damage yet I can easily work out how to get around and modify this story without being so dumb as to run into this cultural situation, instead of Ursula being Vanessa, she gets her minions/her babies Flotsam and Jetsam [moray eels] to combined to be Vanessa, they already have Arial's voice/siren powers so there you go no problem or better yet problem solved  and on top of that we have these servants and other personal being under this adopted Prince which is also Caucasian which he also goes on trips purchasing these other a bits which can also be seen as colonialism. Which I have to be honest I found all of this to be the best comedy in this film by some distance, because there is much of it and just to cover my back the only reason I found it funny was, Disney and their feeble attempt to cleanse one of their classics as in my opinion spectacularly failed.

Character developments, performances and voice performances: the character developments are meant to be what they are meant to be for this title, yes as I made reference to earlier yes they can sing for those that have musical numbers. But generally speaking there are variable levels of success ranging from poor, to reliably good to deserves to be highlighted for throughout this shambles they are still able to shine. Sebastian voiced by Daveed Diggs and  Scuttle: a northern gannet which she is a quick mouth individual, which is a good friend to Arial if Scuttle is slightly wrong about the human's and their inventions and other things voiced by Awkwafina and also between these two characters/voice performances they perform this alternative musical number as well.

This film receives: 4/10, this film is mixed; I mean this reimagining was going to get a positive mark, but after a certain point in this film it just begins to take on water and slowly sinks. I mean I could overlook Prince Eric and the colonialism and him being Caucasian, but with full disclosure as soon as we see Vanessa, even though I have partially gave it a weak defence, still gave me no other option but to point out everything. When this content was first made this project has 1 accredited award to its name; 1 Winner The Queerties 2023; The Queerty Next Big Thing.